Friday, July 31, 2009

urge to shoot but nowhere to aim

I really want to take pictures of something. Or someone. I am trying to come up with some ideas. When I don't have a camera I see all kinds of photo ops. If you want to volunteer let me know. I got today, Saturday morning, and Sunday morning. Possibly even monday morning. My trigger finger is itching and I'm ready to shoot!

Thursday, July 30, 2009

walk hard

I walked 4.4 miles yesterday. Believe me, when I set foot out the door it was not my intention to walk that distance. I was trying to walk to the grocery store closest to me. I tried to walk a different way than I usually do and before I knew it, I was at main street, which was way past where I intended to go. I wasn't mad though, a little frustrated because it was hot and humid, but I need the exercise. When I finally made it back home, I was tired but I felt good. I walk pretty fast. Maybe subconsciously I'm trying to overcompensate for the fact that I can't drive. Well, I don't really believe that, but its a good way to transition from walking to driving. I can't drive. It isn't a huge deal to me because driving has never been a priority to me. But now I'm 21, and dammit I need to be able to drive, so my girlfriend is teaching me to drive her car. Which happens to be a stick. It is HARD. Each foot and both hands are active. I'm still trying to get the hang of it. Shit I'm still trying to make it out of first gear smoothly. Poetry, poetry, poetry. Just had to throw that in there.

i want you

I want your body intertwined with mine until Two heartbeats form one rhythm I want your eyes, ears, arms, mind, and heart all open; I want you unclothed, exposed and Vulnerable I want you unafraid, unashamed and unapologetic I want lips upon lips upon lips Toes curled, feet arched to match curved back I want you sighing& Moaning, speaking in tongues silently and audibly I want you leaving evidence of your fingerprints on sweat slick skin I want you coming. Repeatedly Us simultaneously sporadically until you spontaneously combust with me I want you fulfilled and yet always hungry for more I want you selfishly Greedily Selflessly Intellectually I want you wise enough to know that we have things to teach to and learn from one another I want you psychically Lines on my palms continued on your hands I want you telekinetically Thoughts from my head continued in your mind I want you craved and crazed Declared insane cause your obsessive compulsion is me I want you heavily medicated so drugged up on this love that you hallucinate and still see me I want you mathematically Algebraically You as my constant the only variable changing is time I want you geometrically The sine to my cosine The perpendicular to my parallel line so that the angle we create is right. I want you poetically Rhythmically stringing together Words just to explain the mundane and make it sound profound I want you in beats staccato, crescendo, fortissimo, in addition to lyrically so let's just just say I want you musically I want you infinitely This desire knows no bounds it is limitless and far too vast to be contained in me so I have no choice but to let it spill all over you I want you wet Soaked in this love and steeped in it like tea I want you with desire all encompassing with complexity and simplicity I want you unafraid, unashamed and unapologetic I want you naked as the day you were born, much more mature but just as fragile I want you unclothed,exposed and vulnerable Eyes, ears, arms, mind, and heart all open I want you all to myself I want you to want me all to yourself I want us submerged in we I want you infinitely This desire knows no bounds it is limitless and far too vast to be contained in me so I want you to understand and if you don't its all good shit I know you don't like math and this is a lot of words to add up so this poetic equation can be simplified down to three words: I want you.

Monday, July 27, 2009

7.27.09

So this morning I'm in the car with Meghan, headed to the train station. We get to a red light. And this old man is crossing the street. He waves at us and smiles. Now there is nothing wrong with that. But he does it all slowly and suggestively, and he's staring at us. I mean he is all up in the car. He even turned around to keep looking. Smh. I swear my girlfriend and I get stared at all the time, whether we're together or alone. I'm headed to my mom's house to do my cousin's hair for school. I stopped at CVS to pick up some snacks because hair takes a long time(she wants individuals) and I need to eat Something before I take my vitamins. So I'm in the store. I get stared at the whole time I'm in the store. By men and women. And I think this man was following me. Ugh. Anyway, I have been thinking about my poetry a lot, but that's nothing new. I really miss Java Monkey, but I told myself that I can't do a poem at an open mic until I have it menorized. Each time I share me poetry with an audience, I want to treat it like a slam. I figure that is the best way for me to improve as a performance poet. Once I get better with my delivery I will start working on my spoken word album. I'm excited about it! I know its gonna be hot shit. I wonder how my first day in the classroom will be.

Sunday, July 26, 2009

random

I feel lovely. I had some shots of vodka, then I mixed apple juice and vodka and drank that(a pretty big cup), and when I get home I'm gonna have a Smirnoff XBT. My tolerance is high so I'm not even tipsy yet. I just feel relaxed, and I'm looking forward to enjoying an evening with my girlfriend. My girlfriend and I get stared at a lot. I don't know why. Maybe you can explain it to me. I will post a picture of us on my blog. Sundays are bittersweet. Its a relaxing day, but it also signifies the end of the weekend. Which means my boo has to return to her job aka the plantation. Ok so in addition to my alcohol tolerance being high, I also sober up quickly. This is a good thing most of the time, but a bad thing when I intentionally get buzzed and actually want to keep that buzz. That's all for now. I shall return.

Thursday, July 23, 2009

i enjoy her.

We are eating a salad, roasted potatoes, and crab. How great is that? All my posts are not going to be about food. I enjoy time like this with Meghan. No TV. Just conversation and basking in her inner and outer beauty. I love and enjoy my girlfriend. She doesn't have to work tomorrow, so we're probably gonna be up sharing stories like girls at a sleep over. Except there is nothing childish about what we share.

Wednesday, July 22, 2009

croissants

I swear this is sin. I just got these strawberry cream cheese croissants from DeKalb Farmers Market. They are made with all organic products. I feel guilty for eating it. That's how tasty it is. I want more things from there. Like bread and cheese and cookies and fruit and vegetables and whatever else I need. If only I weren't such a broke college student. I can't afford to shop at the damn farmer's market!

7.22.09- Excitement

I am excited. I go that I learned something new excitement That I passed my test excitement That Mommy's taking us out for ice cream excitement That first kiss excitement I got that riding a bike without training wheels excitement That first love excitement That just married honeymoon excitement That second honeymoon excitement I am excited because I have living proof that passion and purpose can coexist. Poetry is my passion. Teaching is my purpose. I can do both. It's possible. I'm inspired because I know someone who is doing both of those things and so much more. She gives me hope. I don't have to choose between the two. That makes me happy. I hope I can blog from my phone. I shall return later. I'm about to see if I can do this on the cellular device.